In the child-free community, they would call me a fence sitter – a person who is unsure about whether or not they want to have children one day. Despite this, sometimes aggressively imposed, label, I choose to embrace ambiguity in this area in the same manner in which I approach labeling my sexuality and gender…
It has been a decade since I began pondering the queer nature of my sexuality, ten years that feel like a lifetime when I consider the person I’ve become since those “I kissed a girl and I liked it (way differently than she did)” days. Despite the depth of self-reflection around the queerness of my…
My queer identity is constantly evolving. For too long I resisted this growth process, worrying that my inability to find a perfectly fitting label would cause others to question the validity of my sexuality. So much of my initial journey was consumed by this deep insecurity that the rest of the LGBTQ community wouldn’t find…
I will be coming out for the rest of my life. No setting is safe from this phenomenon. I have to come out everywhere – in the grocery store, at work, when meeting a friend of a friend. The process of coming out is lifelong and dynamic, despite the well-known concept of “a coming out…
There is something deeply inspiring in an act of pure authenticity. My husband coming out as transgender was the purest of such acts. His acknowledgement of his need to live a valid life at all costs began shaping the decisions we would make in the future. There was no more room for inauthentic living in…
The nature of family is inherently unique, despite a snapshot from the 1950s and numerous conservative groups claiming otherwise. My favorite course in college was an American Studies class simply named: Families in America. Already out and proud, I reveled in the way our professor educated about family structure throughout history, disproving the nuclear family…
What is our obligation during teachable moments? When we witness misconceptions or a complete lack of understanding about the LGBTQ community, sexuality or gender, are we – as members of that community – obligated to speak up and educate? Does our firsthand experience and knowledge create some unspoken commitment, or are we allowed to hold…
“You’re such a great ally.” After I advocated for an elderly patient and her partner by reminding staff to be sensitive to the unique needs of LGBTQ older adults, my coworker spoke these words to me with genuine appreciation. My reaction surprised me. I was thrown, not knowing how to respond. Did I thank her?…
Pride was a rite of passage. During my first Pride, back in Baltimore, Md., I remember looking around and feeling completely overwhelmed by simply existing in the same space as thousands of other LGBTQ people at once. It gave a sense of community and context to my identity that I desperately needed. My network was…
My mindset began binary. During the early years of my coming out journey, I felt it mandatory to choose a label within the LGBT acronym. I feared being seen as confused or uninformed and sought to fit in. I needed to convey to others that I was not straight, and I saw the L, G,…
