To solve world problems I regularly attend my weekly discussion group where, on occasion, I shyly and reluctantly offer my humble opinions, suggest hints of advice and make tactful corrections. Last week, beguiled by an amusing video on a male art site, I missed my bus and so stayed home. It seems my non-appearance, greeted with dismay by some (and delight by others), was a cause for concern resulting in my phone ringing at 9:15 p.m. We seniors seldom receive calls after nine, so I answered with the dreaded anticipation of death, debt or disaster. What a relief to find it was a friend from the group wondering if I was OK.
“How kind, yet how unnecessary,” I thought, but then I reconsidered and realized the LGBT umbrella is our family, our security. Living alone, family far away and our circle of friends shrinking, like it or not, for many of us seniors us is all we’ve got! If you do not enjoy this unwritten bond, come out and join something; anything and get involved. San Diego has many choices that will revitalize you and get you away from the TV. You will soon develop a circle of like-minded, caring friends. It is crucial that we LGBT seniors become family and look after each other.
Relating back to the original situation: when an unexpected absence provokes an array of negative possibilities leading to the inevitable question as to what to do, the answer is: call. Forget the time and the momentary inconvenience. Your friend will soon calm down and appreciate your thoughtfulness. And just possibly, you may save a life.
Enjoy the past
I just returned from visiting my sister midst the wilds of Iowa corn fields where I was delighted to take part in a dinner by kerosene lamps hosted by a charming Amish family. With the six kids ages from six to 12 (two sets of twins) all doing their part, mother prepared a fantastic meal on an old wood stove while father made furniture in the barn during daylight.
At dinner, he with his long beard, but no mustache, was always joking and informative. He and the boys wore dark trousers (buttons forbidden, so suspenders) and white shirts (hooks and eyes) and the girls, like mother, were in long dresses and white caps, but with fancy glasses frames, Mickey Mouse socks and pink shoes proving rules can be adapted. And yes, they had a horse and buggy.
I also had a nostalgic visit to a classic, rural general store. With a heavily laden strip of fly-paper dangling over the cash register, it had the usual “goods and sundries,” but much of the merchandise had certainly passed its shelf life. A faded Shirley Temple coloring book, dust covered Larry, Curley and Moe mugs and for only 39 cents a pair of those huge, red wax lips. The display of mood rings brought back memories, but sadly I did not see any pet rocks on offer. Young people might not appreciate all these treasures, but my sister and I had a ball. So my advice this week is to visit the past with some same-aged friends.
True, looking back can bring sadness, but that is up to you; skip over dangerous territory. Why waste the time? You can have a merry, even boisterous afternoon relating and reliving the fun you had, the sillier the better.
Laugh together with seniors who can understand the LGBT world of our youth.
