As a progressive Christian, I believe there are many names for God and many ways to a loving God; this article reflects one of those ways. Take from here what works for you. Celebrate life with joy and peace!
Recently, our Clergy Intern, Rev. Jeremy Schaub shared a sermon at MCC and with his permission I’m happy to share it with you. Blessings, Dan.
Even during June gloom the sun seduces us behind a fluffy veil of clouds. Birds sing year round. Have you heard the birds singing recently? When you listen to the birds singing it’s a sign you’re in touch with the most vital parts of your inner world.
As a chaplain, listening is at the core of my work. It’s the same whether working with the homeless, in hospice, or in my current role as a chaplain at the Veteran’s Medical Center.
Every story I hear is as unique and beautiful as the person telling it. Each has a common thread. We are all human! We all bleed red. Each of us has challenges and vulnerability.
Recently a veteran in the psychiatric ward requested me. I was pleasantly surprised because I don’t regularly work on that ward. I was proud the veteran knew a ‘family’ chaplain upon whom they could call.
The conversation left an impression. So, I asked permission to share part of our talk.
The veteran shared their passion caring for other people who are feeling vulnerable or dealing with life challenges. They lamented our community’s shortage of caring people to nurture those facing life’s inevitable challenges.
Next, they shared a paradox. Despite recognizing the value of connecting with others in the midst of life’s difficulties, they admitted to socially withdrawing when life is most challenging. They stop attending church and back away from friends.
Their experience resonated with me. I admit to withdrawing in the same manner during tough times. The faux mask of serenity fits me comfortably in life’s storms. I admit fearing that no one really cares or wants to hear about my challenges. I can feel completely alone.
It’s like the fear of being stood up after painstakingly primping before a first date. I could rant about why someone would be so neglectful, not even sending a cancellation text. But, I recognize a time when I was also neglectful. As a new chaplain, I felt inadequate. I couldn’t fix people’s complex problems. At times, I’d simply avoid them.
I stopped avoiding those I care for. What changed? I’m glad you asked. I came across a cheap poster. The poster read, “80% of success is showing up.” After that I realized I didn’t need to fix anything at all. I just need to show up.
Months later I sat with a 17-year-old Latina whose baby was stillborn. I listened to her speak a language I didn’t understand. Nonetheless, my showing up made all the difference. She wasn’t alone.
When we’re going through tough times, if we don’t want to be alone, we need to muster the courage to show up. We show up, squash our shame and fear, and say, “I’m feeling vulnerable.” It’s my experience as a caregiver that you offer another a wonderful gift when you allow them an opportunity to journey with you in your vulnerability.
But, let’s admit it. Our community forbids anything slightly resembling drama. Often shame drives us into the closet of despair. Fear leads to solitude. Sometimes we remain alone for ages. We fear our imperfection. Everyone else is perfect, right?
Let’s face it; we aren’t great about caring for one another either. Perhaps, like me when I was starting as a chaplain, we fear our own inadequacy. Other’s vulnerability reminds us of the painful realities hidden behind our own mask. We feel powerless to fix other’s challenges. That’s the entire problem. We rob others of the opportunity to grow when we attempt to solve their problems. They don’t need us to fix anything. We just need a connection with others when life challenges us.
