We all have friends whom we love, but who occasionally make us roll our eyes. Such a friend drove me to a recent California Men’s Gathering (CMG) event. The trip started with the announcement he had forgotten to find out how to get to Alpine and asked me. Foolish question. I can’t even point to north. Friends drive me and I just sit and look pretty. He thought it was “somewhere” near Ramona so off we went.
He was right. We finally arrived and checked into one of the “Quiet Rooms” which he assured me meant there was no talking at night. Another mistake. It meant “no snoring” according to some rather rude guys in the next room who claimed my little cat’s purr was coming through the concrete wall.
Next day we unpacked the huge box he’d brought for his collage-making workshop. It contained books and magazines about collages. Oops, wrong box; the one with brushes, scissors, paint, glue, paper, etc. he had left at home. Oh well, with his enthusiasm and love of art he showed us how to create beauty from whatever we could find.
The next day just before leaving, the car keys disappeared from the pocket of his jacket which he flung in disgust on the floor. Hours later after hysterics, wild accusations and streams of exceptionally creative profanity, someone picked up the jacket and noticed it jingled. Surprise! The keys had slipped down behind the torn lining. How we laughed (sort of).
Did I have a great time? Absolutely. So what if my rolling eyes got a workout; his exuberant personality and sincere friendship overcame all. Such friends are rare and precious. We must appreciate and love them while we can.
Fill out your important papers
A traffic accident recently took the life of a close friend which brought to mind the need for young and old to be up-to-date in one’s will and medical directive.
Many think preparing such documents will somehow signal the end is around the corner. Hey! It is anyway! The only question is which corner. Age has nothing to do with it nor does the size of your estate or your current good health.
The mass of legal, medical, family, real estate problems following your death create a terrible burden for your friends and relatives to face without your guidance. Someone has to answer vital questions and make innumerable difficult choices and that someone should be you.
Through a will or trust you get to tell who you want to get what; plus funeral instructions, burial, cremation, body donation, etc.
And don’t forget a medical directive detailing who can visit you, if they should resuscitate you, give you drugs, pull the plug, etc. Answers are needed at once: “He told me…” is meaningless!
All your choices and instructions must be written and shown to the proper authorities. This means the impractical naming of out-of-town executors and/or health decision makers will result in huge problems. Please name local people, plus second and third choices. Give them a copy of the documents and the medical one to your doctor also for his files.
Your instructions are no good put away in your safe or desk. Save your family and friends from having to make these sometimes heartbreaking decisions; not to mention the possibility of serious disagreements and irreparable hard feelings among the ones you love.
You know you should do it, so do it.
With a sigh of relief, you’ll wonder why you didn’t do it sooner.
