In my long ago age of innocence I thought the sign “Adult Toys” meant things like 3-D chess sets. On innocently entering the shop, I gazed with shock and horror on magazines, books and videos of such decadence and immorality as to shame the devil! As I turned to flee, a clerk, wearing the most minimal parts of a gladiator costume, kindly offered to show me around. Manners dictated I acquiesce.
First, the display counters. His graphic explanation of the instruments and “things” left me pale and shuddering. We then entered the costume room to be met by a mannequin in a maid’s uniform guaranteed to cause even the most liberal of dowagers to swoon.
A collection of large fuzzy animal costumes gazed at me before I was surrounded by various styles of male and female rubber suits all looking hot and uncomfortable. (How can the wearer enjoy a dance party?)
Then came the leather garments with exceedingly elaborate buckles, snaps, lacings, zippers, belts, chains, even padlocks! A toilet challenge and most uncomfortable, if you ask me; in fact, downright painful; which brings me to the wall full of paddles, whips, flogs, canes and switches.
Some looked almost real; likewise, the display of throbbing, wiggling, vibrating male appendages and rubber lady parts (finally, answers to some life-long questions). All in all, quite an education.
For a fascinating afternoon, grab your partner and drop in to a “toy” shop. With gasps and giggles, you’ll be amazed and mystified. Who knows, you might buy something.
The shame of the unmarried relative
My sister Alice and her friend are coming for a visit. Uncle Jack and his pal live in Seattle. They are roommates, housemates, buddies, share a condo, etc. All popular code words for a relative’s unacknowledged sex partner, oops, life partner.
Regrettably, many older gays, both men and women, continue in this out-of-date deception and are still reluctant to “confess.”
Years ago, if you did not live near the family and visited rarely (leaving your partner at home), they might really not understand. In 2012, however, the flood of movies, TV shows and books about openly gay celebrities, DADT, bullying, gay marriage, etc. has brought the topic into all our homes. Such openness has lowered the atmosphere of hate and homophobia and raised the awareness of the gay life style to an all-time high.
Families now accept the fact that Uncle Jack and his buddy of 35 years are more than roomies and Aunt Betty and gal-pal Francine (“Frank”!) really use the second bedroom for the dog.
In other cases, however, everyone prefers to keep things unspoken, otherwise they would be forced to confront reality and have to do something i.e. say something.
Should we advise our friends to come out? No. We cannot anticipate the possibly disastrous ramifications within someone else’s family or circle of friends. Instead, we should support them in their decision, mind our own business and hope the next LGBT generation can live their sexuality openly.
