Every year when the New Year begins to loom large on the final calendar page everyone is all about losing weight, exercising more, quitting their respective vices and resolving to make the upcoming year the one that will be the best ever.
Sometimes, the resolutions stick like the floor of a movie theater, while others slide off faster than a greased up stripper falling off his or her pole.
But fear not, there is an easy way to make the most out of 2012, if only in an entertaining way, and that’s by salivating over some new TV shows.
I wouldn’t drink if you didn’t upset me so mush
Ab Fab’s Patsy and Edina return to TV. Now settle down; everyone’s favorite alkie-haulics are back, beeyatches.
But, there is a catch to it – the Absolutely Fabulous 20th Anniversary Special is just that … special.
Well, something is better than nothing, right? Especially when it comes to Jennifer Saunders and Joanna Lumley who will be celebrating, with champs and little nibbly things no doubt, a homecoming of one of the dynamically drunk duo.
Unfortunately, their Christmas special will not be airing in the U.S. Remember, I am just the messenger … stop throwing things at me, fruit bruises easily.
Airing Jan. 8 at 10 p.m. on BBC America – isn’t that an oxymoron?
Someone else that likes to get her swerve on, Chelsea Handler, is serving as the bartender, err, the executive producer on the from-the-page-to-the-sound stage version of NBC’s Are You There, Chelsea? That’s minus the Vodka and It’s Me from the memoir title, OK?
Since the filthy late night talk show hostess with the mostest is busy with her chit chatting on E!, Laura Prepon of That ’70s Show will portray Chelsea Newman … bet she’s glad she kept her hair dyed blonde. Newman, like her real-life counterpart, doesn’t curtail her libation intake after a DUI, she just avows to never drink and drive again. It’s called progress people!
Oh, and Handler will be onscreen as the other Chelsea’s older sister Sloane. Plus, Prepon’s former ’70s costar, Wilmer Valderrama, will guest star on a future episode. Wednesdays at 8:30 p.m., starting Jan. 11.
G to the A to the Y
NBC’s Smash, which is pronounced with several more s’s sssister, doesn’t sound all that gay. Psyche! It’s a more mature take on Glee – hey that’s what’s been said about it, I love me some immature Glee – with Will & Grace’s Debra Messing (gay) about the staging of a Broadway musical based on Marilyn Monroe’s life (double gay). It also features Megan Hilty as the star of the showtune extravaganza, Katharine McPhee and Anjelica Huston as the latest big screen star to give the small screen a go. Begins Feb. 16 at 10 p.m.
Are you down with G.C.B.? Yeah, you know me. Word. But, what you may not know about this upcoming sitcom is that it had the acronym from its book source material of Good Christian Bitches, until it became Good Christian Belles. What did Rick Perry in his Brokeback Mountain jacket tell ABC that the title shouldn’t openly serve in primetime? Smooth move Ex-Lax.
Anyhow, the skinny on this show is that it probably has more homo street cred than Perry would be comfortable with … look for his subsequent foot tapping arrest sometime in the future. Starts March 4.
Stuff and thangs
One goal that is very attainable is to not watch Work It… a cross-dressing for the sake of employment comedy… didn’t they stop making crap like this in the ’80s? Hey, at least that decade’s similarly premised Bosom Buddies had Tom Hanks and Peter Scolari seeking housing as women. This one stars Benjamin Koldyke as a not-so-passable lady person and does bring Prison Break papi Amaury Nolasco back to the small screen. I have a feeling it will be a short reunion, as the network only has two episodes in the can …just where it was created and belongs.
Airs Tuesday Jan. 3 … you’ve been warned.
Do you miss Lost? Sure, we all do! Then check out ABC’s The River and Fox’s Alcatraz starting Feb. 7 and Jan. 16 , as both are looking to fill that vacated slot.
Down the road, we have the Dallas reboot on TNT in the summer with the slurp-worthy Jesse Metcalf and Josh Henderson as Bobby and J.R. Ewing’s offspring. And Ricki you-wuz-robbed-girl-on-‘Dancing With The Stars’ Lake has a new talk show set to debut in September. Hopefully, it will be as trashy as her last one.